I highly doubt that you'll be able to hit all those targets without spending some serious coin on an integrated coilover system. At least not if you mean that it has to be proven via shock dynos of each individual shock. If you're reasonably certain that you'll be keeping the same spring rates, then custom valved Bilsteins are probably the way to go.
That said, I'm quite happy with my Tein Flex's, I've even had driving instructors comment that the car handles quite well, so they can't be that bad.
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